Adding in Friction, Embracing Momentum
The 5-second rule. 20-second rule. 10-minute rule.* These “rules” are all either about slowing yourself down (so that you don’t act on an impulse that nudges out higher priorities) or about grabbing onto the fresh energy of an impulse you want to be following.
The 10-minute rule: If you feel the urge to do something that’s not the thing you’re focused on, try telling yourself, great, you can totally do that thing!—as long as you wait 10 minutes first. At the 10-minute point, it may be that the very important task that occurred to you no longer feels so urgent, or that the pull of the fun distraction you remembered doesn’t feel as strong.
If you’re in deep work mode and you think of an internet task (or something else that’s not the thing you want to be prioritizing), jot the task down on a list. (Keep a notebook or app open for scribbling down any stray thoughts or tasks you want to come back to later.) And then…go back to whatever you were doing instead of breaking your focus and potentially being sucked down into a rabbit hole.
The 20-second rule: Set things up so that you can’t instantly access the things that distract you.
Set up internet blockers. Turn off non-essential notifications on your phone, and leave your phone in another room. Add a 20-second (or longer!) barrier to accessing the distractions that you mindlessly reach for or that feel especially alluring. This strategy might be a “set it and forget it” situation—one-time changes to how you set up your physical and digital workspace—or might involve some daily setup or tweaks.
The 5-second rule: There’s something you want to do and you think, okay, time to get down to it! Try counting down from 5 (5…4…3…2…1!) and then actually doing the thing on 1, before you can talk yourself out of it or talk yourself into a lengthy delay.
Maybe this strategy can help you with things like getting up promptly in the morning, taking out the compost, pulling out your exercise mat and doing some jumping jacks, sitting down to your writing without putzing around for a while first, calling to schedule an appointment…
The 5-second rule is about acting on the energy and momentum of an intention before that energy fizzles.
I use all three of these strategies—but I want to start leaning even more heavily on the 10-minute rule and the 5-second rule in particular.
The 10-minute rule is about cultivating a patient mindset. It’s about staying out of the “excitable-puppy-chasing-after-every-squirrel-that-darts-in-front-of-you” mode, even when ideas aren’t flowing freely and writing feels hard. (Of course, the 20-second rule can help keep squirrels off your path!)
The 5-second rule is about embracing the energy that comes from setting an intention and not getting in your own way.
These rules of course aren’t actually rules—just tools! Play with them and see if they are useful to you in your writing practice, your work day, or your home routines.
*Sources: I learned about the 10-minute rule from Nir Eyal’s book Indistractable. I came across the “20 second-rule” framing in an essay by Gayle Scroggs for The ABD Survival Guide; James Clear’s book Atomic Habits develops a similar strategy in a lot more detail. The idea of the 5-second rule comes from Mel Robbins’s book The 5 Second Rule, though I first learned about it from Dani Donovan’s The Anti-Planner.